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Feedback on my first three chapters? Historical fantasy
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@Aiko Hartwell1d agoI'm starting a new serial set in 1800s Japan with fantasy elements (yokai, spirit magic). Would love feedback on my first three chapters before I commit to the series. Specifically wondering about: - Is the Japanese cultural setting respectful and well-researched? - Does the magic system feel fresh? - Is the pacing too slow for a serial?
2 Replies
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@Selene Marquis18h agoJust read all three — the cultural detail is beautiful. One suggestion: your first chapter is heavy on worldbuilding exposition. Maybe move some of it to chapter 2 and start with more action?
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@Luna Park12h agoThe yokai integration is really creative! Agree with Selene on pacing — chapter 1 could use a stronger hook in the first 500 words.